Are you constantly rushing?
A few years ago I lived my life constantly rushing. Not because I was always late but because I felt like I always had a million things to do and I hated it. I don’t like to feel bogged down with endless tasks and feel busy but I also know that I feel accomplished when I am productive. As I learned this about myself, I had to make sure I wasn’t creating more to do so that I could feel more accomplished when I checked things off the proverbial list. It’s a subconscious thing that a lot of us do because we have mistakenly adopted the concept that being busy equals being successful.
The problem about busyness is that there is no peace. We are constantly moving, on the go, thinking of what’s coming next or thinking about all of the things we need to do. It is a giant energy drain and the pressure can literally bring us down. We become exhausted and stressed and eventually burn out. We don’t enjoy the things that bring us joy because we are no longer living in the moment but so in our heads about what we need to check off next that we miss out on life.
Here’s a great example when I realized what I was doing to myself.
My son picked out a dozen beautiful roses at the store while we were grocery shopping. I love to buy flowers and it was beyond sweet that he chose them for me. I have been doing a lot of self care lately, so it was perfectly fitting to get these deep red roses. Deep love, deep connection, deep care of myself.
After arriving home I was cleaning up the stems. Trimming them at the ends and removing the leaves that I didn’t want. And then it dawned on me – I realized I was rushing through the process and mentally spinning my list of all of the things I wanted to accomplish that day. Both boys were napping at the same time which is absolutely unheard of – let alone the older babe napping at all! I was literally in the midst of a total miracle! When I realized what I was doing I stopped. I was creating stress and anxiety while I was doing something that I should be enjoying. Something I actually do enjoy. Arranging flowers, especially red roses, is an ultra feminine, artistic way of expression and ultimately a gift to relish in. And what was I doing? I was rushing through it, not present whatsoever and creating stress in my mind by running through the list of things to do for the remainder of the day.
I am a workaholic by nature. I feel successful when I am productive. This has taken me years to learn, accept and ultimately be conscious of. It has taken work to reframe my understanding and definition of success and I still catch myself feeling successful when I’m ultra productive and checking things off the perpetual list. So for me, to be consumed mentally with running through my list of things to do was actually natural. It was a classic cocktail of the need to be productive and accomplished with a splash of lack of boundaries.
When we are mentally consumed and internally repeating over and over, let’s say, our list of things to do, we are expending an incredible amount of energy and creating stress, anxiety and no space in our lives to just be in the moment and enjoy exactly what we are doing.
If you continue rushing I guarantee you will:
Not really finish that much faster
Probably do something that will cause the project to take longer (ie messing it up somehow which will require you to fix your mistake). So why not let the busy-ness go and enjoy it?
Burn out quicker than you can imagine and need to escape the pressure (which can bring a whole host of other situations).
So here’s what I did to get back into the present moment and stop spinning in my own head:
1. Write it all down. Seriously get it all out of your head. Every little thing. Now this may stress you out to actually see everything you have to do written out but repeating the list in your head does nothing positive for you and its actually more stressful to fear forgetting something. I can tell you that getting it out of your head frees up a huge amount of space and stress.
2. Be conscious. Be aware of what you are doing and why you are doing it. We have so many distractions. So much to get done. So much to accomplish. But we don’t have to be thinking about it at all times. In fact to be more productive we must have breaks and focus. I used to be a huge believer in multi tasking and while I still think its appropriate in some cases, I am a practitioner of focusing more on one thing at a time now.
3. Get into the practice of enjoying what you are doing in the moment. Life is full of distractions and its one of our modern problems to stay focused and present.
Trust me getting out of rush mode will change your life. You will be more calm and at peace. You will enjoy your life more and be present for the things that really matter and bring you joy.
Food for thought: Where do you feel like you are rushing? In your daily life? In little tasks? Do they require you to rush? Can you mentally shift from that, and take your time and actually enjoy the experience?